Consultancy / Counseling Services
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We Counsel
Why Counseling………….???? The speed and complexity of modern life continue to increase as our expectations has boundless .Causing it , we drag us to Anger, Greedy, Anxiety and finally Grief to destruction. Coping well to recovery we require autonomous and flexible thinking and clear decisions. Unfortunately most of us have been conditioned to conform, not think for ourselves. Counseling skills help people to change as they learn to think things through for themselves and make their own decisions free of the effects of past conditioning.
What is to be counseled for……????? When we seek, or accept, help with an issue we have been unable to resolve on our own, there is often an emotional component in the situation. We often feel bad about needing help. The problem may itself cause confusing feelings. In the latter it cases feelings of liking; irritation and anxiety are present together. It is extremely difficult to think clearly when we are feeling strong feelings whether good or bad. The primary function of counseling is to help people think clearly when feelings are present. The feelings can arise from an experience in the present. Hearing "Your job is redundant" would obviously generate negative feelings in most people. Someone who got into trouble with head Master at school might equally find meeting a senior administrator intimidating. This would remind that person of the earlier painful experience. He or she would then find it hard to think.
What are the counseling skills ……...!!!!!! The counselor’s job is to help the clients; the client, help him/her self. If the client is to feel safe enough to be open about his/her thoughts and feelings, he/she needs to feel safe, respected and understood. We elaborate some skills to follow:
How does counseling work ……???? I assume that all humans have immense potential and are intrinsically intelligent, powerful, co-operative, zestful and loving. Unfortunately, this basic nature is often obscured as we grow older. Our nature is such that we are easily hurt and when hurting our thinking process shuts down. When we act without thinking, the consequences often cause further hurts, which reduce our capacity to think in the situation still further. We then behave in a rigid, stereotyped way every time we experience a situation that reminds us enough of the original situation in which we were hurt. This complex process develops rigid responses to situations rather than a flexible appropriate response. Fortunately, we had highly effective mechanisms for discharging our hurts and thus recovering our ability to think in any situation. A child that is experiencing, or has experienced hurt, will typically find someone, often an adult, and get this person to pay attention to him/her. The child will then talk actively, laugh, sweat, shake, have a tantrum, cry or yawn. If the adult can stay in touch with the child, perhaps offer a warm hug or hold a hand, the child will discharge the painful emotion exhaustively and then go back to playing etc. quite freely and with no rigidities installed by the hurtful experience. The above describes the counseling process in its natural state. Unfortunately most adults have had their discharge processes thoroughly interfered with in their childhood so will suppress the exhaustive discharge required because it disturbs them. Children quickly learn that discharging painful emotion is punished and learn further rigid ways of controlling their feelings, when discharging them would be helpful. The counseling process the counselor provides the love, safety and attention necessary for the client to feel her/his feelings and discharge them. The feelings that condition behavior in rigid patterns may arise from present hurts or past hurts. It is necessary for the counselor to examine many ways to identify and outwit the client's patterns, including the control patterns, so they can discharge.
Isolation is a component in almost all hurts so simple, warm, attentive listening is often enough. Where it is not, the counselor has to listen well enough to understand where the client is hurting. Then he or she must think how to show to the client that the rigid injunctions he/she feels are distress not reality and do so. An example could be a client whose hurt is about being accommodating and being exploited who says "I have to put up with it, I am lucky to have a job". The counselor might ask the client to stand proudly and say in a confident tone "I am NOT going to be a victim ever again". He / She would find this difficult to say and would laugh, cry, sweat and perhaps get angry trying to do so. This would, when persisted in, discharge the hurts that installed the victim pattern in the first place. Following discharge, the client can think clearly about the painful experiences and decide what to do freely without the compulsion of the "victim" pattern. There are literally hundreds of techniques like the above to deal with particular distresses.
What are the implications for organizations……..???? Staggering! Most of the problems of organizations require people to work together to solve them. Listening is the key skill required. Counseling training is the best way to get people to appreciate the value of listening and want to listen well. Organizational performance depends on the quality of the thinking of staff at all levels. Counseling enhances the ability of the client to think and his/her willingness to act powerfully. These skills are vital to get the best from people and therefore for all managers.
Domestic Violence
What is domestic violence …..???? Domestic violence constitute, misunderstanding, Feeling loneliness , Anger, Feeling action for revenge which effects of Sorrow , Anxiety and Fatal Grief. The domestic violence on victims can be apprehended by fundamental human rights violation and what you can do to prevent and fight domestic violence.
ARE YOU A SURVIVOR….????
Are you a victim of domestic violence? If you think that you are a victim of domestic violence, read through the following section to see what domestic violence is. You don’t have to be a victim any longer. We also give tips about what to do if you are a victim of domestic violence as well as the below help lines and counseling centers in your area. Women in your life should know what they can do in the face of domestic violence.
PROTECTION OF WOMEN FROM DOMESTIC VIOLENCE ACT, 2005 (PWDVA)
Learn more about our legislation protecting women to live lives free of violence. Through the Ministry of Women and Child Development, we want to spread the word about the PWDVA, so that women across the country know their rights.
Matrimonial / Separation/ Divorce
Marriage Problems, Family Problems Relationship Problems & Divorce Sources
List of links that help people involved in a crisis in the areas of marriage problems, family problems, divorce help, relationship problems, mental problems, curses, and spiritual problems, needing a therapist, marriage counselor or divorce support, also, divorce groups for men, women, and kids. Divorce Support, Divorce Groups for Men, Women and Kids Divorce Care: Find Help, Discover Hope, and Experience Healing through our expertise Counselors. Choosing Wisely Before You Divorce:
A Crisis intervention tool for pastors, counselors or friends to use with couples whose marriages is in trouble and may be heading for divorce. Are you or your spouse considering divorce? Get healed by our Counselors.
Cheating Spouse
You suspect there may be someone else with your spouse but every time you bring it up with your spouse, he/she denies the possibility. All the signs are there you found but you don't have any proof. So, pay attention to the signs and your instinct but, be careful and don’t confuse signs with proof. Your hectic life schedule may not permit you to nab them red handed but you are here to have a strong hand of our counselors, who can recuperate you needs. I LOVE YOU …..BUT I AM NOT IN LOVE WITH YOU….!!!! ….???? If you hear these words, a Big Bang warning bell should go off. This is one of the most consistent things a Cheating Partner will say. Your spouse may have a deep, loving bond with you but, intense feelings of passion can override the bond with you and cause your spouse to lose sight of his/her true feelings. The Cheating Partner will develop what I call hormone - induced amnesia. The surging hormones and passion they feel in their new relationship can cause some skewed thinking.
Parenting after separation
Parenting after separation can be pretty tough as you contend with your own feelings while also focusing on the children. Separation should not mean the end of a relationship with your children. The family will continue, but in a different form. Even though arrangements may change, in many cases children benefit from having both parents in their lives. Children's needs and their best interests are the first consideration in any separation or family breakdown. Changes to the Family Law Act are based on the following principles:
All children have a right to know both their parents and to grow up with their love and support.
All children have a right to be protected from harm.
Parenting is a responsibility that should be equally shared, provided this does not put children at risk.
Parents should be able to work out together what is best for their children rather than fighting in a courtroom.
It's right to ask for help. It might surprise you to see how supportive people and the community can be. You don't know until you ask our counselors.
Parents Children Relations
The majority of parents and adult children experience some tension and aggravation with one another, a new study says. But parents generally are more bothered by the tensions - and the older the child, the greater the bother. The parent-child relationship is one of the longest lasting social ties human beings establish," "This tie is often highly positive and supportive but it also commonly includes feelings of irritation, tension and ambivalence. The study will be featured in an upcoming issue of the journal Psychology and Aging. The researchers asked about tensions related to a variety of topics, including personality differences, past relationship problems, children's finances, housekeeping habits, lifestyles, and how often they contacted each other. Parents and adult children in the same families had different perceptions of tension intensity, with parents generally reporting more intense tensions than children did particularly regarding issues having to do with the children's lifestyle or behavior. According to one of our counselor tensions may be more upsetting to parents than to children because parents have more invested in the relationship. Parents are also concerned with launching their children into successful adulthood. Both mothers and fathers reported more tension in their relationships with daughters than with sons. Daughters generally have closer relationships with parents that involve more contact which may provide more opportunities
for tensions in the parent-daughter tie. Both adult sons and adult daughters reported more tension with their mothers than with their fathers, particularly about personality differences and unsolicited advice. "It may be that children feel their mothers make more demands for closeness, or that they are generally more intrusive than fathers." It surprising that parental perceptions of tension increased with the adult children's age, particularly about topics having to do with how they interact "Middle-aged children may be less invested in the parent-child tie than young adult children because they're more likely to have formed their own families and experience multiple role demands and as parents age and come to want or need more from their relationship with adult children, adult children may pull away, creating greater relationship tensions. Relationship problems like basic personality differences and parents providing unsolicited advice tend to cause more problems, It may be that these kinds of tensions are longer-term, and reflect deep-seated conflicts that you just can't escape, whereas conflicts about lifestyles, education or finances can sort of be put off to the side if you make an effort. The good news is that both parents and children were most likely to deal with problems constructively by trying to accommodate each other's wishes when problems came up, working to find solutions to problems, and trying to accept and understand the other's point of view. The more intense the tension level, though, the less likely parents and children were to use constructive strategies and the more likely they were to try avoiding the issues or use destructive strategies such as yelling or arguing etc.
Balancing work and family life
Work shouldn't get in the way of your personal life. Here are resources to help you find balance between your career and family. Explore alternative work options, find out if you should be a stay-at-home-parent, and learn how to deal with issues working parents face. Elder care, being the caregiver for an elderly relative, can harm your career. Find out how to keep elder care from having a negative effect on your career. Family factors have more influence on a child than the amount of time that child spends in child care, according to a study by The National Institute for Child Health and Human Development. Get help with choosing quality child care and other issues.
Personal and/or job stress
The medical and psychological literature pertaining to personal and organizational strategies for handling job stress is reviewed. The paucity of research in this domain is emphasized as is the lack of involvement by industrial/organizational psychologists. Many strategies for managing job stress exist but their effectiveness has not been evaluated. It is important that such strategies receive the immediate, scientific attention of psychologists. Issues that must be faced before significant progress can be achieved are discussed
Depression / Anxiety/ Grief
Anxiety: A Complementary of Grief Anxiety is one of the most common complaints seen in medical practice. Anxiety disorders as a group affect more than Thousands of million adults in the world population. Children and adolescents can also develop anxiety disorders. People who are anxious report a subjective feeling of apprehension, uneasiness, tension or terror in response to danger. Other terms used by patients to describe anxiety are nervousness or worried. Most people experience feelings of anxiety before an important event such as a big exam, business presentation, or first date; this anxiety is generally brief and relatively mild. Anxiety disorders, in contrast, are chronic, relentless, and can become progressively worse if not treated that fill people's lives with overwhelming anxiety and fear. Tormented by panic attacks, obsessive thoughts, flashbacks of traumatic events, nightmares, or countless frightening physical symptoms, some people with anxiety disorders even become housebound. Anxiety disorders, in particular post traumatic stress disorder may occur after experiencing or witnessing a traumatic event such as rape, child abuse, natural or human-caused disasters or accidents.
Different Types of Anxiety: Each anxiety disorder has its own distinct features, but they are all bound together by the common theme of excessive, irrational fear and dread.
Panic: Repeated episodes of intense fear that strike often and without warning. Physical symptoms include chest pain, heart palpitations, shortness of breath, dizziness, abdominal distress, feelings of unreality, and fear of dying.
Obsessive: Repeated, unwanted thoughts or compulsive behaviors that seem impossible to stop or control.
Post-Traumatic Stress : Persistent symptoms that occur after experiencing or witnessing a traumatic event such as rape or other criminal assault, war, child abuse, natural or human-caused disasters, or crashes. Nightmares, flashbacks, numbing of emotions, depression, and feeling angry, irritable or distracted and being easily startled are common. Family members of victims can also develop this disorder.
Phobias: Two major types of phobias are social phobia and specific phobia. People with social phobia have an overwhelming and disabling fear of scrutiny, embarrassment, or humiliation in social situations, which leads to avoidance of many potentially pleasurable and meaningful activities. People with specific phobia experience extreme, disabling, and irrational fear of something that poses little or no actual danger; the fear leads to avoidance of objects or situations and can cause people to limit their lives unnecessarily.
Generalized Anxiety: Constant, exaggerated worrisome thoughts and tension about everyday routine life events and activities, lasting at least six months. Almost always anticipating the worst even though there is little reason to expect it; accompanied by physical symptoms, such as fatigue, trembling, muscle tension, headache, or nausea.
Anxiety Disorders can Co-Exist with Other Physical or Mental Disorders: Anxiety disorders may accompany almost any illness such as cancer, arthritis, diabetes or heart disease. It is common for an anxiety disorder to accompany depression, eating disorders, substance abuse, or another anxiety disorder. Therefore it is important that the accompanying disorders are also treated. Before beginning any treatment, however, it is important to have a thorough medical examination to rule out other possible causes of symptoms. Common Symptoms Associated with Anxiety: People experiencing anxiety can manifest a wide variety of signs and symptoms. Common symptoms of anxiety disorders include unrealistic or excessive worry, sleep disturbances, dizziness, jitteriness, racing or pounding heart, upset stomach, numbness in hands, face or feet, and fatigue. a listing of potential complain include: Giddiness Dry Mouth Stomach Pain Hyper ventilation Shakiness Dizziness Diarrhea Chest Pain Restlessness Headache Clammy Hand Muscle Aches Fatigues Nausea Trembling etc.
Financial Problems
Money is something we can't live without it, but it also causes a plethora of stress issues all on its own. According to our study 70% of the job holders have financial problems and they're financial stress leads to many health issues, particularly depression. With the rise in credit card debt and foreclosures on homes due to adjustable rate mortgages, many people are finding that their financial situation is having a negative effect on their health. People who experience a great deal of financial stress often pick up several unhealthy coping behaviors. These behaviors include habits that are detrimental to your health in more ways than one, such as smoking and drinking. Additionally, people under financial stress also tend to overeat. Combine these factors with the financial stress and their stress levels have just doubled. Another factor of financial stress is that it leaves people with less money to take care of themselves. People under immense amounts of financial stress often have very little money for anything extra in life. This means that they have to cut corners in areas such as health care, just so that they can buy food. Small health issues that they are forced to deal with without the help of a doctor can often magnify into much larger health problems, which also leads to more stress.
Those under financial stress also find themselves unable to sleep at night. This can add up to a sleep deficit, which has an impact on your life in more ways than just one. Not getting enough sleep causes the immune system to not function properly, which leaves at a greater chance for health problems. Not having enough money to pay for healthcare can cause those issues to become worse and the circle continues on until you are in a much worse state than before. Additionally, not getting enough sleep causes you to be moody and to have reduced cognitive abilities. This leads to a bad memory and inhibited learning ability. Financial stress is one of the leading causes of stress in entire world. This stress only compounds when they add in their daily hectic lives as well as the inability to maintain a healthy lifestyle and attitude. Preventing financial stress means you have to try and live a debt free life as much as possible. And to overcome with your financial problems you should contact our counselors to guide you in proper path to heal up your financial issues.